Friday, Jun. 09, 2006, 3:09 p.m.: toxic...
I'm tired today...not phyically but emotionally. I suppose it ends up translating into physically, but really, I am not physically tired. Does that make any sense? I was told by a naturopath that I crave salt b/c my adrenal gland is over-worked. 'Stress does that to you'...she said. This whole week I have been pouring salt on EVERYTHING. It's as if my tongue can't taste it...or it's so charred from the over abundance of salt that I even fail to notice it's tearing into my flesh/muscle. Your tongue is a muscle, I believe. Still, I've been religiously going to the gym and pushing myself past my limits. I get home and I eat some dinner, watch some tv and pass out by 11.30pm. K always asks me why I'm so tired. He stays up passed me and he runs a/r all day long...talking to people, making deals for sponsorships, etc. I envy his un-ending amount of energy. He's not drained constantly by negativity tho...so I can't blame myself fully. I'm working on how to block it out but I've come to the conclusion that I need to just get away from it. You can't heal properly if you're constantly being battered by negative comments etc. It's driving me nuts. My family is toxic. I think to myself, should be past this point in my life. Huh, looks like I'm behind.