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Monday, Sept. 15, 2003, 9:11 a.m.: done...

I had a full shooting weekend. Ended us missing my wrap party, for the film I just finished though. I figure it's okay b/c we're going to be holding a fundraiser for it soon...I can go to that instead. My new best friend was calling me non-stop though that night, all drunk, leaving me messages, wanting me to show up. It was cute...I have to say. The DOP [camera man, basically] on the shoot e-mailed me the next day, telling me to keep in touch and leaving me his number. I figure he's one of the ones I could stand on the shoot, so it's worth it, plus he's a definate connection too. Actually, on the shoot this w/e, the DOP on this set fell in love with me. Fucking guy not only creeped me out the whole two days, by incesstanly staring @ me, but he then ran a/f me in the hall way to tell me he wanted to see me again. Like hello!!!! It's not like we especially bonded @ any point through the w/e!! He first tried to corner me in one of the rooms as I was getting my shit together and then chickened out when I abruptly moved out of his way b/c I thought he was looking for something. Then he did the whole run down the hall a/f me, while I was walking out with another cast member, and asked me infront of her. She told me he was doing the staring thing with her too, until she threw out the boy-friend comment..then he fucked off. Some people can make you feel so oncomfortable and they seem to be oblivious to the fact that they look like fucking weirdos. Either that or they don't give a fuck.

I'm back in the swing of things again...a/f being totally thrown off on that 3 week shoot. I've got myself a couple of auditions booked and tomorrow I'm getting my pics printed for my agent mail-out. I also managed to track down some more of myself on tape, that I can add to my package. I even stayed away from potential 'emotional damagers' [slightly dramatic comment] this w/e, which was very impressive on my part. As far as I'm concerned the only thing I'm going to throw myself @, from now on, is my work...all other 'things' can take a back seat. You know when someone is in love with you and as of now...I don't know...and I need to know if I'm ever going to put myself in that kind of position again. Oh, I also decided that I'm going to contact my ex and get together with him, but not b/f I talk to my ex-girlfriend first. I think we all have some closure to accomplish and I want to be able to move forward properly. These are some things that have to be done.

Love, CAT xXx