2002-07-12, 8:55 a.m.: what the fuck!!
You know I love my friend E (one from Ireland). But, she's been back 2 days, only, and she's already driving me fucking bonkers. I mean, the last time we really spent time together I was in gr.10. I have changed alot from then and I think she expected things to go back to the way they 'use' to be, but 'use' to be was like, more than 9 years ago. She's been extremely defensive with me over some things, that don't even garner defense, and she's been very demanding of my time. Now, I haven't seen her yet, but she's come home to stay (for good) and I have a fucking life and things I need to do. I don't like it when she gets this way, b/c you know...I just broke up with my b-friend. I don't need another one in a friend. I'm going to, for now, explain it by saying that she's just returned home to somewhere she hasn't been in 5 years and is still a little culture shocked. I'll give it some time and see if it persists or if it fades, b/c she's much more fun to hang a/r when she's not so fucking uptight and angry. I'm not in to that in a friend...the anger needs to be taken out on the right people (if anyone) not the ones you fucking care a/b. I don't need to fel like I'm in an argument with someone everytime I talk to them. Hey, but that's just my opinion. I'm really not up to this shit, seriously. I left my home b/c I clashed with my family. I left my b-friend b/c I clashed with him, and I've left friend's b/c of similar situations...b/c I am more than fucking fair, and that's a rare damn quality these days. Fortunately I have it, but too many peple think they can take advantage of that, and I refuse to allow that to happen. I love her, but I gotta do what I gotta do.
So hopefully I'll manage to have an enjoyable w/e.
Love, CAT XXX