Monday, Jun. 14, 2004, 9:40 a.m.: shoot...

Weekend shoot for me. I kinda had an emotional break-down last week...it came to it's close Friday night and into Saturday. I think I was sub-consciously getting into character. I was practising for my emotional scenes for this coming weekend. The thing that sucks is that, when I get on set, I end up talking to people and my mood gets better. I have to isolate myself to stay in my drowning pool of misery. Must remember that for the weekend where it matters that my mood must stay down. I found my trigger music/songs/thoughts/phrases...I just have to put them to practise now. I have a crush on our DOP though. He's Middle Eastern which makes me melt every time. He's a married man though, not into that situation...sorry. Not unless they're into a threesome, or something to that effect.

I got 2 more rejection letters from agencies...not good. That leaves me with 21 that still haev my shit. Tomorrow I'm going to be calling the first 10 on my list to see if they're interested in meeting with me. I will have to come up with a new plan of attack if I don't score a fucking agent this time a/r. I don't want to have to worry a/b that now, but being who I am I will.