2002-07-23, 8:49 a.m.: it lingers...

I'll tell you what's really shit. I dream a/b my ex @ least twice a week. It's fucked, cause during the day I hardly think a/b him. I feel like he's haunting my mind and I always dream a/b him with other chicks. I guess I don't have to say that I had a bad sleep. It sucks, really. I go to sleep thinking a/b the 'new' guy so I can dream a/b him, but NO, I'm plauged by the ex.I use to enjoy sleep...now I'm not so sure anymore, especially if these kinds of dreams continue.

I called my landlord yesterday to tell her (it's not a him, like I thought) that I can't stay there. She told me I'd be screwed for the remainder of the rent, which by my account is not true. Tonight I have to cancel my acting class, so that I can go down and see her. I've gotta give her my notice and get her to sign something for me. I even have to bring a friend as a witness...what a damn fucking hassle. As far as my potential new place, I think it will work out with this girl. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. If not, I've got a list of affordable bachelors downtown that I'm going to look into.

I got my bitchy friend visiting this week. Probably explains some of my bad ass mood. My last class is next week, so I gotta perform two monologues for the class w/o any critiquing from my teacher. Which, you know, is fine cause she can be a stupid bitch sometimes.

My friend is playing one of the clubs in T.O. tonight, so I'm going to go down and check his band out. I have his c.d. but I've never seen him live so this should be a cool.

I still have this lingering feeling that something is missing in my life. Like I'm not doing enough or giving enough. It's something that I can't quite put my finger on yet, but I'm sure it's coming...heading to the forefront of my mind. It never fails.

Check it out, man! Dare you even attempt to match my rank in evilness? Love, CAT XXX