Thursday, Jun. 10, 2004, 9:27 a.m.: bad start?

I was @ the opening gala for the Italian Film Festival last night. I ended up being the first one there, and all alone, so I decided to sit out in the open by myself. Of course, everyone takes interest in someone who's sitting alone and it makes very easy conversation when someobody wants to approach you. So this guy decides to come over and chat and I tell him a/b my movie, give him a card, sell him a couple tickets. By the time the rest of the crew got there, guy was sold and I was getting free drinks. Then I figured I should go and chat with my cast so I left him by himself, to go and re-sit with his friend. I don't like forcing myself on people to talk a/b my movie, and I hate yapping on and on a/b nonesense. I like it when I can hook someone in and then they just keep asking me questions. A/f that, they tend to do the talking for a while and then I leave. I hate posers though and I never want to come off as one...I like it to naturally happen. My next sell ended up being the bartender...cute guy, an actor too. He was funny, he managed to entertain me too instead of bore the fuck out of me as we spoke. I drank a bit too much and had sort of a hang-over this morning, that I'm now curing with coffee. Those chicks were there though yesterday, dressed in matching out-fits...biting my hat/shoe styles. Fuck. They're the type I would call posers, from what I've seen of them. I'm beginning to see their weaknesses though, you know, the angle I can attack @...it starts to become very clear a/f a little while. It helps that I'm observant and I guess a little psychotic too. My girlfriend told me the other day, sociopaths/psychopaths are the best actors b/c nobody can see where they're coming from. Now, I know those two words have very negative connotations but if you swap them into a positive light, to use @ crucial moments with those who deserve it, it all becomes relative and acceptable. They say that big ceo's and people in high positions of power have major sociopathic tendencies, and that seems to be reveired. I'm just going to make those terms famous for the right reasons...in my opinion. If there's one thing I despise a/b women it's got to be their competitive nature, their need to see others fail and failure to embrace differences and insecurity. I play devil's advocate though until I see shit soming out @ me. Bitches need to be taught. That's my rant for the day.

What ever happened to the warm weather??? It rained last night and it's now freezing cold outside. We are in the middle of fucking June and it's this cold?! It's pretty messed up! My family is taking off to Florida soon...w/o me. I was suppose to go with them until I booked another part that is filming every weekend in June. I also have my movie premier that I must be @ and another fundraiser party for a short I shot that is heading to bigger festivals. Sucks that I can't enjoy the weather there though. They all try to guilt trip me a/b not going, but as far as I'm concerned they're all missing my premier for their stupid ass trip...I should be guilt tripping them. The reason I'm not is probably b/c I could really care less if they come or not, less stress for me. I hate seeing them pretend to be excited and supporting, when they're not. It makes me ill. I do have alot of friend's coming and that's all that matters to me. When I'm on the big screen some day and they're pretending that they supported me all the way, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to tell them that they can buy their tix @ the box office. See ya!

My girlfriend leaves for NY tomorrow morning. It's going to suck w/o her a/r...I'm going to miss her. I'll get to talk to her though all the time, so I can handle it. I think I'm also going to take a trip down there to party for a bit in NYC. NY is somewhere that I would love to live, so I'm sure we'll have a blast. She sadi I can stay in her room for like $10 a night, according to the woman who on the place. Awesome deal and no hotel rooms. If I bring someone down with me though, then I'll consider staying in a hotel...depending who it is I bring with me. I want to move away. Am I having a bad start to my day today?