2002-07-24, 9:04 a.m.: Rarr, rarr, rarr...

So I don't know if my dream had any bit of truth to it, but yesterday I got a call from an old friend from high school. @ first I didn't know who the fuck it was and then she told me...to which I asked how she got my number. 'I saw 'ex' a couple of weeks ago and he gave it to me.' AHHHHHHH!!! Now I don't totally mind this chick, but I would be in serious rage if I found out that anything happened between them. Especially, if she's calling me in the process. Oh god, watch out. I have this terrible sense of possesivness still towards him and it really fucks shit up with me. Funny thing is that on the w/e I picked up some herbal drops to balance out my negative feelings of possessive love. I'm drowning myself in them tonight. So I'll probably call her and hang out with her, just to see what's up. I just better not hear any wacked out shit, cause I'll freak.

I didn't make it out yesterady to go see my friend's band. E, who I was suppose to go with, got nauseous on me and she was driving down there. He's going to be upset, I think. I feel bad too, but what could I do. Sucks.

Talked to my landlord and she's getting soemone to look @ my place today @ noon. I gave her my notice, so hopefully everything will go as planned. I can't even pay this months rent. My cramps are gving me heartburn and they're light cramps. I'm on the pill cause, well we all know why...but I'm also on it cause I get killer cramps that leave me feeling like I want to stab myself in the abdomen. I get weak, and break into cold sweats curled up in pain. I can't walk and it hurts so damn much that punching myself in the stomach is my only help...I don't remember if I ever took pills for it, I think I did...the birth control pills work much better. It just numbs the feeling alot more.

So last night was pretty much a complete waste of my time. I saw a really funny movie though, so it was alright...'Corky Romano', really stupid but some fucking hilarious parts. I was laughing so hard @ some points that my face was stuck. It was great!

I know the answers to this radio contest, so I'm going to go try and win a car. Wouldn't that be awesome if I did?! Yes, yes it would.

To my sweet fucking angel Cheree. Fuck, I love that name! We're going to design a killer page that will totally encompass how I feel @ this point in my life. I just don't feel like my 'Madonna' one is doing it anymore. You know I appreciate you with all my heart. I hope one day I will finally be able to meet you.

Temptress
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