2002-07-22, 9:23 a.m.: pulling...

I'm not in a very talkative kind mood today. I don't really feel like writing. My life feels so boring right now, and really it's the same as it always was...minus the b-friend. Yet I feel so bored. I have to do something a/b this situation, cause it's bothering the fuck out of me.

I walk by everyone in my building and I feel as if it's a strain to even say hello. Like I don't want to bother, but I force it out and it kind of just whispers from my lips. I think I"m being pulled in too many directions right now. Instead of concentrating on myself, I'm still trying to do for everyone else. It's a tough job. I want to do it, but I can't handle it anymore. When am I going to be happy taking myself into consideration. I don't know, I could be spitting out garbage right now, cause maybe I just need to give to be happy. I'm confused...